In case you haven’t noticed. Wait a minute, let me start
that over again. I KNOW you haven’t noticed. I haven’t written anything in a
pretty long time. In fact, by this time last year, I had five laugh and pee
inducing posts already up. This year, sadness and urine retention rates are way
up.
“So, Kev, whaddup wit that?”
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| "How can I write when ...I....don't.....have a computer?" |
Honestly, it hasn’t been bothering me at all this year. So
maybe the fact it WASN’T bothering me should be bothering me? I am so confused.
When the words stopped flowing, I wasn’t worried. I’m not one to force a post
to come out. Whenever it happens, it just kinda happens. I hope you guys know
by now, I value the time you give to read this here lil’ blog, so I am not
going to insult you with half baked, bullshit posts. I work pretty dang hard
for you 12 regular readers.
Recently, at what I would describe as a “work function” that
us elected officials have to attend, we did an ice breaker game to start. Everyone
had to offer a fun fact about themselves. When it got to me, my “fun” fact was,
“I hate this game because all of your interesting fun facts make my life look
lame.”
If there’s two rules of writing (or public speaking) I can
offer you, it would be these:
1) Try to make people laugh. Even if they don't, they will appreciate the effort
2) Give a little piece of yourself away
Lately, I haven’t been able to do that. (in dramatic voice) So no post for you! I haven’t had many experiences worth “our
time.”
And that’s kinda it, right? “Our time.” We can do so many
things with it. Sure, we all have the commitment of jobs that owns most of our
clock. Life is what happens when the hours are ours. (Say that three times
fast.) The “free time.” The time we do things that we enjoy. The activities
that excite, challenge, inspire, drive, encourage, refresh, renew us.
Man, does anyone have a good fart joke? Because this is
where I need one. I am a little rusty.
However, I truly haven’t been doing nothing. Since we’re all
honest here, I’ve kinda been doing work on myself. Now, let’s not get carried away here. I am
sure you already know this, but I will say it anyway:
I AM FUCKING AWESOME AS I AM
.
Yet, that still doesn’t mean I can’t get/be better. And, no,
this isn’t some hippie, new age bullshit. Think of it more like focusing my
efforts where I get the best result. Some days, with the free time I have, I
think it will be best if I go to the gym. Or walk the dog. Or read. Or
volunteering. I can get a lot back, fairly quickly. But writing…man…
Think of it like return on investment. Sure, I can get a lot
of enjoyment out of writing what I think is a funny/witty/snarky/honest post.
Then, I can bum myself out by the relative lack of hits, and zero responses. I
can let myself get more pissed by further seeing a banal picture getting 200
likes and 300 ZOMG!!!! comments. And I’m
working on the whole “let it go” thing. It doesn’t mean I stop writing; it
just means do the best I can, then, literally, let it go. There’s so much out
of my control. And I am fully aware of human nature NOT to respond positively
to anything. Humans suck that way, and I am pretty sure DNA backs me up on this
as well.
What takes you ten minutes to read (also another reason I
don’t use long words) literally takes me HOURS of time. Time to write, rewrite
and edit. Or, as I have seen it eloquently called, “word surgery.” Then find,
add and caption the pictures. Do rudimentary SEO in the seemingly vain hope of reaching
a broader audience. Then, let it go. If people, respond/react, that is just a
bonus.
I believe anything we do with our leisure time is escapism,
right? You’ve had a hard shift/day/week, etc, best to blow off some steam. Isn’t
that the point? And that escapism can take many forms; some positive, and some
destructive. I will point to a few of my real examples, because you don’t have
a blog about yours.
Say I’ve had a long week. All my constituents have been all
up in my grill, calling my office, emailing me about all kinds of nonsense. “Why
can’t we make this a one-way street?” “The street light buzzes too loud.” “I
think there’s a meth lab next door.” Ugh, these people are so needy! And they
think I work nights and weekends, too. Ha! I’ve never seen what 3:01 looks like
on the office clock.
I can release some steam/escape positively by, say, going to
the gym. Just me and my music, lifting heavy things, trying to justify the $100
of new UnderArmour I just bought. (That only works out to a t-shirt and one
left sock, BTW.) I can be positive and get the pup out for a long walk and try
to see this world through his eyes. I can dust off my old PS3, pretend I am the
Undertaker and brain people with steel chairs. I can write or read. Discover
new music. All positive things.
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| Me on a Friday and or Saturday night |
I can also be destructive. I can drown my day in booze. A
lot of times, the lines blur for me. Take for example, writing this here post.
As I type, it’s Thursday, and the sun is going down, and Friday morning seems a
week away. “You know what would make this post even more funny?” the devil
voice inside says. “Rum.” I know you readers probably think the same thing. I
can drink and play racing games where I run the opposite direction and try to
wreck everybody. I can pretend I’m the Undertaker and brain people with steel
chairs.
I’ve been trying to make better choices for myself, because
I can’t make better choices for you knuckleheads. Lately, the trend has been to
spend less time writing, and more time destressing in other pursuits. As a result,
I liken me writing less to prostitution; there’s no real victims here. There is
even a theory along the lines the less you do a thing, the better you get at
it. I guess I am testing to see if that’s total bullshit or not. It’s a risk I
am willing to take for you, dear reader.
Forgoing writing has allowed me to take on another difficult
burden; evaluating myself to see where I actually can be better. I am pretty
sure a better Kev would equal a better writer for all of us. And oh yea, I am
still totes serious about #VoteForKev2020, so I better get my shit together
quick. Hmm, a better Kev and a better writer….sounds like……
A SEQUEL!
Coming soon; A Brutal Evaluation Part 2.
