Friday, November 28, 2008

Black Friday

So today is Black Friday. While the ‘black’ in black Friday comes from the thought this is where most retailers get out of the red (i.e. negative) and get into the positive (which would be black, duh), for me, the ‘black’ means what it traditionally does-dark, dour, evil, etc. So if you think you’re going to get a warm and rosy holiday post, ya might wanna read someone else.

I do not get Black Friday. I mean on some levels, I do. But for the most part, I fail to understand the whole phenomenon. I don’t get the point, don’t see that anything is worth the hassle. It seems every year, there is a growing number of people-motards, mostly, who make this their new tradition of acting like a jackass in public for a few hours in a greedy mood. “Hey, it’s Black Friday, let’s get the family out together to the mall and act like savages. Ho ho ho.”

From what I understand, there is some sort of preparation involved. I know it’s a big thing to get the paper Tgiving Day and peruse the countless ads, flyers and circulars to find the best deal. I admit to it being a kind of tradition when I go over to my in-laws. “Ohh, that’s a good price for crap I don’t need.” Seriously, I can’t tell you how many gifts I gave/received that I’ve never used, played, worn, shot. I’m sure I could spend days listening to CDs and watching DVDs that were gifts. So I think a lot of this BF business is good intentioned, but a waste. Anyway, I guess you get all these circulars, compare prices, what time the stores open, etc and plan out from there.

It doesn’t help that Xmas commercials now dominate every TV show the way the political ads did a mere month ago. Most of these commercials are insulting and totally unrealistic. In this economy, I find it highly insulting that car manufacturers still make commercials where someone gets a brand new fucking car for Xmas. Seriously, do you or anyone you know ever have this happen to them? (And if so if that company hiring witty and insightful bloggers?) Keep in mind this is the same field that sent executives on cushy jets to go in front of Congress and beg for bailout money. I kind of have a problem with that. And what are the actual logistics of buying someone a car? You better get everything right. Color, features, etc. You would be the biggest tool if you bought your husband a stick and he only knows how to drive automatic. You want him practicing on the brand new car you gave him? I wanna know how you get the money to buy a new car, and your spouse doesn’t realize that thousands of dollars are missing from the account. I am sure the scenario had happened where the guy pulls out a ton of money to buy a new car, the wife suddenly discovers the money is missing and gets all huffy. Yea, great idea, pal. And just where does one hide a new car? Can you just “sneak” it into the garage and hope he never goes in and discovers it? Do you park it further down the street, or a neighbor’s driveway, then suddenly run out of the house Xmas morning to put it in position? And the most pressing question I have is where to you get the big fucking red bow that is on the roof of the car in every damn commercial? Enough of these commercials already.

The other commercial I saw was the Walmart one where the cashiers are all turning their lights on and of to some Xmas song. They look so happy and thrilled to be there. At the end of the commercial, they are proudly standing outside their aisles, smiling, and waiting for the great unwashed masses to clog their store. How come every commercial depicts a calm soothing atmosphere on Black Friday? All the employees are happy and smiling like some sort of brainwashed Xmas zombies. All the customers are friendly and well behaved. What dafuck kinda Bizarro Land is this?

So you would think BF starts of Friday, right? Wrong. For some losers it starts Wednesday night. I had the local news on this morning, and they always run the story of how early people get in line. I think this years’ “Winner” got in line at 10 AM Weds morning. How is this even an option? How does one explain to their family that I won’t be at Tgiving because I have to wait in line for 30 hours to save 2 bucks on the new Beyonce CD and a few other gizmos and doo-dads? Yet, every year, there are those idiots, proudly standing in line. I saw how at one Best Buy, there was over a THOUSAND fucking people in line. How ‘bout we thin the herd here, and just shoot all these people and do society a favor? (unless, of course, they happen to be buying me something.) Surely, these people can’t have anything going on in life, right? Where do you pee? And why are there legions of people compelled to miss Tgiving and stand in the dark and cold all night? There are always stories how these stores have ‘limited’ amounts of said hot item. So you could wait in line for 5 hours for something they only have 5 units of. It’s a scam and people fall for it every year.

Now every year when I write this post, my usual answer is “it’s because they’re stupid”. But this year the economy is a huge motivating factor. Many, many people are down on their luck, and money is an issue. OK, I get that. So I will give you that there are some smart, normal people who are doing this because they have do. And that is a fair number of BF shoppers. But the rest of them are still fucking idiots.

Let’s not forget the real victim here; the employees. I know many of you are my old retail warriors, and today I am thinking of you. I worked my fair share of BFs, and I know what a huge fucking pain in the ass they can be. Customers forget any sense of manners or common sense. They have some sort of attitude, and it’s your problem. It absolutely kills me to see these stores opening up earlier and earlier. How can you really enjoy a good Tgiving with family when you have to get up at like 2 AM? Many of these workers are parents, so you got kids and schedules and dinners and travelling to think about. I am sure much of that has to be radically rearranged when you have to open the store at 4 fucking AM. I’m sure there are district and regional managers that are required to be at the stores, too. It pisses me off to no end that the corporate jackoff who mandate stores open at 3 & 4 AM are still sleeping in. In their mattresses stuffed with money. While they are on holiday in some French chalet. OK, so maybe I am exaggerating a bit, but I am sure it isn’t that far off.

Again, with this economy the way it is, every last account has to wring every last dollar out. So if they have to do that by opening at 3, well then that’s what they do. I am sure you have all seen the email that lists all the stores that will be closing a lot of their locations or closing down all together. How fucking sad. I am sure there are many lifers that made countless sacrifices to said stores, only to lose their job right after the holidays. I can imagine working at one of those stores through the holidays, just to know you will be outta work come January. I’ve been there, though. Back in the days when the music biz was good, it wasn’t uncommon for most malls to have 2-4 record stores. I was in such a mall. My 2 Sam Goody stores were directly downstairs from 2 Walls. Well, we found out a few days ahead of time that our other Goody store would be closing after the holidays, and that the staff was to be told Xmas fucking Eve. How fucking low class. I begged my district manager to tell them sooner or later, but not on Xmas fucking Eve. What a Goddamned insult. “Merry Xmas, you’re all losing your jobs and we’re turning this into an outlet for all of our crap for the next month.” Lemme tell you, spending Xmas Eve putting up big black and yellow STORE CLOSING signs is no way to live.

You guys working today have my compassion.

Imagine how surprised I was to find myself actually tempted to get up ass-crack early and subject myself to the BF madness. T was going to be a trooper, and get up early to get some shopping in for her nieces. And for a few minutes I toyed with the idea of actually going. What if all my notions of BF was wrong, and it was actually fun and worthwhile? Maybe I had to seize this opp to take in another BF from a shopper perspective. I wouldn’t do this for me. No way. I would do it so I would have something to write about. So, in essence, I would be doing this for you, dear reader. Yes, that is the kind of sacrifice I am willing to make. But then I realized I was off my fucking rocker for a blog that hasn’t even had 300 hits in a few months. If I was around 500 or so, then I would toy with it, but I ain’t getting myself all fired up for just a few readers. Plus, bed was really comfy this morning. Plus if I went, that meant T wouldn’t buy anything for me. OK, that’s the real reason. I didn’t go because I wanted stuff. I apologize for blaming you over my own greedy shallowness.

If you are one of the fortunate to not be working in retail today (or the unfortunate who just aren’t working at all) it’s a good day to sit back and watch the news. The lead story is always BF shopping, and there is usually some good/frightening footage of shoppers gone wild. I am sure there will be video from North Dakota of a Walmart opening it’s doors, and streams of people come rushing in and someone gets trampled. I hope to see some good customer fights over the last Bratz or Hannah Montana doo-hickey.

Jesus Christ! I just watched the noon news, and there was a Walmart employee who was killed when the crowd broke through the doors and trampled him. I have no problem watching 2 idiots fight-I mean who cares who gets hurt?-but that is just too much. Another developing story is that so many people are paying with cash this year that stores are running out of change. Again, it’s the economy, stupid. My poor ass is staying inside.

So if you’re one of ‘those’ ones who have to go out today, take care of yourself. Keep in mind those poor souls who have to work today, and deal with too much shit that ain’t their fault

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Halloween Party 08 Director's Cut


OK, so now I am in the mood. Last night was the annual Halloween party, and it really got me psyched for my favorite holiday. I admit to being a bit off this year. What happened to all the cable channels having Halloween programming? Where’s all the vintage B&W movies on Turner Classic or AMC? Not even Discovery, TLC or even SciFi have much Hween programming. Last week, I got together with the guys to watch some horror flicks to get in the mood. We watched the original Last House on the Left and House of 1000 Corpses. I was disappointed in both. I’m jonesing to see Saw 5. But the party last night really picked me up. As much as I do love Hween, there is more to the story. And this one starts from last year.

Last year we were confident we had a slam dunk idea. But we had to dye some stuff. Fate would step in (as it will later on down the road) and killed our dryer, so we couldn’t go with our first choice, even though we had a bunch of stuff for it already. While that was a downer, it did result in me slutting up my wife as a cop, so it wasn’t all bad.

Flash to this year, and we are a bit ahead of the game. We have our idea, and we know what we have to do. The first thing is we need to find white stuff to dye. The easiest and most cost effective thing to get is thermal longjohns. Sounds easy enough, right? Well, surprisingly it isn’t. After checking the places you think would be obvious, I track down long under wear at Kmart of all places. And I literally get the last top and bottom that are my size. Seriously, what’s the run on longjohns here? I guess it’s huntin’s season or something, but this search took far more effort than I thought it would. And, OK, I do have a confession here. I did buy my shirt a size smaller. I did it because it was the only one they had, and it might, just might, make me look a bit more masculine. And when you’re wearing purple, it’s all about appearing masculine.

Next up was the dye itself. Again, this proved to be more difficult than I had planned. I did all kinds of searches for clothes dye and fabric dye at the obvious places (Walmart, Target, etc). But the one place I found the shade that was close to what we need was at an arts and crafts store. O man. Talk about swallowing your manly pride to go into one of these stores. I am totally lost. This place looks like it sells all the shit you see at the firehouse Xmas bazaar. I don’t think there is another dude in the store. Now I gotta wander over to the dye section. Did I mention the color I was looking for was purple? Yea, I should just leave my man card at the door. I find something that is close enough, and scurry out, hoping no one I know sees me.

I guess at this point, I should explain my philosophy on Halloween costumes. Basically, in most cases, but certainly not all, the more ghetto it is, the better it is. There are times and places when you can get a real expensive, fancy killer costume. But more often then not, it’s more creative and funny to make it on your own. I don’t care what you think, a real deal Batman costume pales in comparison to one made with Sharpies and duct tape. In fact, a proven Hween equation is the more duct tape on your costume, the more kick ass it is. Really, I didn’t make that one up; it’s one of Einstein’s lesser known theorems.

So we are all about doing this up ourselves. Plus, as it turns out, there is surprisingly no premade costumes for our idea. The only ones we’ve seen have been homemade affairs. Some were quite good, others were pretty damn ghetto. T uses her artistic side to draw up the iron ons we will need. She dyes the thermal stuff Weds night, and we get up at 5:30 the next morning to wring them out and run them through the wash. The color turns out pretty good. It is a bit pinker than my testicles would like, but hey, it is Hween. After the wash, I hang them out on the line to dry. I am sure that got the neighbors talking.

Next up is the accessories. This is where creativity and ghetto comes into play. Our idea wears purple boots and gloves with yellow trim. We handled the boots by getting purple and yellow soccer socks. We rip the yellow socks up and tuck them into the purple socks. Did I mention that it’s fairly hard to find purple and yellow socks? That leads us to the gloves. The idea here was to go with dish washing gloves. After visiting many locations that one would think would sell such items, the closest thing I could find was pink. Ok, so this adds to the ghetto factor that we have all these competing shades of purple.

Now it’s Friday, the day of the party. T comes back from this thing she has-it’s called a job or work or something?-and she is suddenly brimming with ideas. One of which is to nix my hard sought pink gloves. She says she will get yellow gloves and tape them with purple duct tape. She also creates the ’belts’ out of the purple duct tape and yellow felt. Our characters also have these funky collar things going on-they’re too cool for capes or something. She whips those out of purple foam. She even comes up with a cape for our monkey that is part of the costume. I don’t know what the hell she had to come up with all of this, but I hope she has it again when she does my birthday shopping.

As I take a shower, a brilliant idea hits me. There is something about my creative bursts that happen in the bathroom. Most of my brilliant ideas hit me either in the shower or on the shitter. Which is far better than having them hit me on the shower or in the shitter. So there I am in the shower, singing Sinatra, when it hits me. “Fuck! I should have gone as myself!” Remember a while back when I was in the paper for the brewfest. I wrote a whole klog about it, and the picture is on MySpace. I just should have gone as me! Wear the same stuff I had on in the picture, and copy and blow up the picture and tape it to my shirt. No muss no fuss, and bitingly creative. I mean how many people can say they went as themselves for Hween. That would have been fucking cool. But it’s too late, as our costumes are done and ready. Fuck, another great idea, literally down the drain.

Now it’s time to put it all together. I discover that the dye we used apparently loosens the elastic in my pants, so we could have a situation here. Aside from my pants potentially falling off, it looks like I dropped a dump in them, they droop so low. I have to bunch them up in the back, and twist them into a ball that T puts a rubber band on. My nice purple pants….

The gloves go on next. They are taped purple with yellow fingers. They actually kinda look Iron Man-ish. The tape is tight, so getting them off and on quickly is not easy. Next, she runs tape around my stomach for the belt. As it turns out, this too, is a bit tight, which is of no help when drinking copious amounts of beer. At least that is my excuse, and I am sticking to it. We get everything all together, and it actually looks pretty damn good. We are confident that our idea is not very mainstream at all, but just on the edge enough that people will go “Shit! That’s a good idea!”. We will be the toast of the party, and win the prize for best costume. And it’s still ghetto enough that’s it’s funny and creative. This is the most confident I have felt wearing purple. And latex gloves.

So we arrive, do a last minute check over everything. I realize I forgot to stuff myself like I said I was going to. D’oh! We walk up and are greeted by the hostess who is dressed up like Slash. Good idea, minimal work, top hat, wig, shades, fake nose piercing, black vest over white shirt and inflatable guitar. I take the cooler around back to where some people are. OK, this is it, this is where we see if this is a hit or a miss. We made a critical error here. T always wants our costumes to ‘go together’, and we separated upon arrival. So me, just by myself might have lessened the impact. T gets the same reaction inside. Finally some people start to get it. But it’s not the hit I thought it was going to be.

As more people arrive, they come up to us and say Power Ranger. Uh, no, not close. The younger kids have no clue who we are. This is another factor I didn’t take into account. I was talking to a 26 year old, and he had no clue. Keep in mind, he was dressed as Senor Frog, and I have no fucking clue who the hell that is. But more and more kids of that age have to ask us. The older folks do get it, some get it right away, some work their way to it. No one wants to get stuck in a dud costume, and I don’t feel that way at all about ours. Not quite the homerun I expected, but I think we are clearly near the top for idea and execution. I guess we shoulda known when a Yahoo image search revealed less than 2 pages of out brilliant costume idea that this might be a bit of a stretch.

Just to paint the picture, and also as my yearly service to you, my 4 dear readers, is to tell you all the costumes I saw. So if you still have a party to go to, here are some ideas (good and lame) that I saw. The guy from Verizon (simple, black jacket with Verizon ID, phone, etc) and his fiancĂ©e dressed the same with a hard hat. Some guy came as Jose Cuervo-belt with bottles, sombrero, Mexican shirt. Another came as the guy from Dewar’s. I didn’t know there was a “guy” for Dewar’s, but he had a beret, flowing white shirt, kilt, shoulder strap with shot glasses, and was giving out shots of Dewar’s. OK, that’s points there. (Plus, he’s halfway to dressing up as Jamie from Mythbusters next year with the white shirt and beret. I wanted to go as the MythBusters a few years ago, but T nixed that idea. We would be Adam & Jamie. I wouldn’t even tart her out as Kari. In the outfit from the balloons flying a lawnchair myth. But I would highly suggest her to do so. Yum)






Another guy came dressed as a pirate captain and his wife came as a Coke can-Captain & coke. This couple always comes up with great couple ideas. Now, I’m not one for dressing up as corporate logos (yea, I’m looking at you Geico caveman), but these were good. Pregnancy was a big thing this year, too. A couple came as a soccer ball (the wife) and a player. She had a soccer ball design over her seemingly 11 month pregnant belly, while he has soccer jersey, shorts, shin guards and spikes on. I said she must not be a good goalie, because obviously he scored. OK, that’s an obvious joke, but funny after 8 beers. Another guy came in a big chef hat and an apron that said Bun Maker, while his wife was dressed as the oven.

Another couple came as a priest and nun, which I think is too obvious. Billy Ray Cyrus was there with Miley, even though I thought it would have been funnier if the dude was Miley’s older boyfriend. An Asian couple came as Dora and Diego. As in every election year, there was a McCain and Palin. That’s real simple with the McCain mask and a suit, but who dafuck wants to wear a suit on Hween? It helped that his wife did kinda look like Palin. Another couple came as the skaters from Blades of Glory. They had body suits on that had glitter and stuff on them. They both had wigs on. Never seeing the movie, I didn’t know who they were. The best part was they walked there dressed up in those costumes. A Las Vegas card dealer (complete with tables and cards, and I only lost $300)and waitress. I think that was it for the couple costumes. There were more couples who came in individual costumes; a zombie and a cat. And speaking of the cat, I think it’s time to retire this idea. There is no work to buy cat ears, draw a nose and whiskers on your face and wear all black. I say if you’re gonna do the cat thing, ya better be dressed as a slut.

More individual costumes; the host was dressed as a ghetto Gene Simmons. There was Moses, a drunk pregnant woman, Caesar salad (toga with salad stuff on it, and a headband made of croutons). Some guy with long hair came dressed as a Norwegian death metal fan or something similar. He had black and white make up on, studded wristbands, etc. I thought he was King Diamond. King Diamond would be a rocking costume, but I don’t think any of his 17 American fans were at the party last night. Of course, there’s always the one person who just writes up a sign and slaps it on for their ‘costume’. This year it was a girl who had ‘jeans $30, shoes $70, shirt $40 not having a Halloween costume priceless’ sign. Boorriingggg. And just a bit disrespectful of this great holiday. BTW, I am not paying $70 for shoes.

I was talking to one of the guys in a dark corner. We were both lamenting the lack of sexy costumes this year. “Yea, the sexy is turned way down this year,” he said. I then punched him for not ogling my wife in her costume. So he did. And then I punched him for ogling my wife. Yea, sometimes you just can’t win with me.

Beer pong soon followed. It was sparsely attended due to the cold temps. It didn’t affect me and my pink covered balls of steel. After clinking hands and looking for powers to activate, me and T won 2, then lost. I would later team with Senor Frog, who at this point I was calling Frogger, and we would lose. Dora came to life. After claiming to have never playing Pong, and getting blown out the first game, she kicked ass. Asian Diego was there for window dressing.

All in all, this was good, clean fun. We lost out to best costume to the Blades of Glory couple. Goddamn. I have to give credit where credit is due. These guys have come up with some great ideas over the years. This was the same couple that has come as Ric Flair and Elizabeth, Captain Stubing and Vicki and Ron Burgundy and Veronica Corningstone. Fuck. I guess I see where this competitiveness comes to when it comes to Halloween. I think it’s all the guy’s idea. He always know how to slut out his wife. And I guess for this party, coming dressed as two dudes beats our hero idea. I carried a bucket around and T had a monkey on her back for this?

For me, this party had all the aura of Xmas Eve, New Year ’s Eve, etc. It was annual, a marker, a seasonal rite of passage, a harbinger that Halloween was/is right around the corner. Just looking around at the spiderweb lights hanging from the garage gave off that special edge, I just can’t describe it. I felt Halloween. Like a wave, I saw it coming. Somehow, amongst all the PVC hung ghosts, along with all these adults, costumed. Right along side the keg or the buffet table, it finally got to me. Amidst all these adults with varying degrees of costumes, it reached out to me. Yes, it has to burn and settle in my chest for a week. I only have a week left till I scare kids.

Man, how I relish in Hween, what a celebration of the macabre. As I take Bauer for his walks, I see the decorations creeping up. Gravestones, cotton spiderwebs, skeletons. I walked him past that fucking house one block up that kicks my ass Halloween night. They’re already building shit. They got dummies propped up, a tunnel constructed to lead kids to the backyard. They have such an edge over me. They got money and time to build-build!-all this shit, and the people to work scaring the kids. On the other hand, I don’t have the time or money to invest on upgrading my front lawn o’ scares. It’s been an exercise in self restraint to not buy Hween shit. T is a trooper and when we’re out she will ask me if I want to stop by a Hween shop. I grit my teeth and say no because I know my few scheckels need to go to mortgage, food, water, etc. It sucks, it really does.

From above, where irony would step in. As it turns out, we wouldn’t have even needed the dryer to make up our costumes. Yea, that’s a kick in the nuts, but at the same time, it still got me T dressed up as a sexy cop. Good Lord, she can arrest me any day. GGGRRRRRR

OK, so throughout this post, I have made many allusions to our costume. Rather masterful allusions, in my opinion. Now I want to know if anyone has figured out who we are. Much like Jigsaw, I have laid many clues. So please prove there are more than just me reading these posts, and post your best guess. I am reluctant to post my mug here, for many reasons, but I will post me in my costume. Until then, it’s up to you. Would you like to play a game?

Please be sure to check KevolutionTheory in a few days for bonus material I am far too lazy and drunk to post now. I promise it will be worth your while.

DVD Bonus features
Commentary
OK, so this was a classic case of starting out strong and just getting to be shit at the end. I mean, look at that ending. How lame. I apologize for putting you through that. Would you be surprised to know I was buzzogging pretty hardcore at the end there. I was torn because I was all full of inspiration and wanted to get this out in a timely manner. I added a new paragraph, added a gratitutious Kari pic. Added a new costume and tightened a few things up.

Deleted Scene
We were stuck as to where to find good purple stuff. T really looked at the pics we were able to find. She made a good discovery; apparently the previous people who thought of this used tights. OK, not exactly tights, but it’s more like ballerina type stuff. Yea, ballerina outfits. I really believe in this idea, so I say, go ahead and order them. We get them, and now I actually have to try this shit on. This is one of those “seemed like a good idea at the time” type of scenarios. T puts hers on and just laughs. I don’t know why, but I’m guessing that she knows I have to try mine on next. I swallow what’s left of my pride these days, and pull this tight purple ballerina top out of the bag. Christ, it even looks like it’s a panty hose package. So I put it on…..

Yea, it’s not a pretty scene. Some huge hairball stuffed into a purple spandex top. So it’s a chick’s top, and the chest comes really low. There is just no way this thing will work. Even T is laughing at me-at me-like a mental patient. I look in the mirror to see my hairy chest more than overflowing the neckline, my man boobs now a stretched shade of fay purple. Now, I have worn many, many questionable outfits over the years (neon, Zubaz, etc) and this just ain’t gonna work. It is enough to make me laugh, but it’s also enough to make us realize this isn’t the way to go. I try to find the sliver lining in this situation of trying on girls’ dance attire, but simply there is none. Just another memory I hope the booze will soon erase.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Unsolicited Praise

And isn't that the really best kind? There's nothing quite like hearing someone say they liked something you did. It's certainly not the kind I get from any of you jerkoffs. I write all these Klogs because they entertain me. Yea, I can say it; I make me laugh. I know when I'm up here in the office and I'm giggling like a mad scientist that I am writing something (in my opinion) is funny and entertaining. OK, and there are some klogs where it's just me spewing venom, but for the most part I do this for me, and am fortunate that through this miracle called the Internet that anybody anywhere in the world can read it. With like 14 gazillion sites to read on the 'Net, I ma flattered that handful of people read my stuff. I know a lot of my 'readers', but I hope there are a bunch of people I don't know that happen upon me.

I admit to sometimes getting caught up in the numbers. I will check my blog hits on MySpace and my hit counter here from time to time. Even though (I think ) I do this for me, it's still nice to know I am not another cretin on the Net who thinks his shit doesn't stink. I have to focus and write what I like and hope for the best. If no one ever read my stuff I would still be just as satisfied with it. OK, that's a blatant lie; I do want many people to read my stuff.

I know I haven't written much lately. Like everyone else, I do have real world stuff that I have to deal with. And writing for me is kind of weird. I generally can't sit down with a blank screen and come up with my usual brilliance and witty insight. I usually have an idea floating around in this otherwise empty head. I have a point, I have a general outline, I have some jokes and sometimes even a flow to the klog. I have to have the inspiration and also the time. There are times when I just know that it's "on" and I can klog my heart out. There are other maddening times when I try to force myself to write out an idea and just write utter shit. And you dear reader, certainly do not deserve any more utter shit than you already might have. Let some other internet cretin fulfill that need. There are many.

The time gods have conspired with the inspiration gods-and I hate when they do that-to prohibit me from writing anything good lately. I have plenty of ideas, just not the time or the mood to hack away. Halloween was last night, and I am working it out in my head, and hope to have it all funny-like in a few days. And that Hween post is not to be confused with the one I have to touch up from MySpace about the annual Hween party. (Lesson learned, yes, I can be too drunk to remember/write everything I planned to.) And I have another idea about how I will singlehandedly create world peace. OK, that last one is another blatant lie, but I'm trying not to sound too selfish. Yay world peace.

So it's ironic that I open up my email this morning and get a message from Helium. Helium is the site I post (cleaned up) versions of some of the stuff I write. I haven't put anything new up there for a month or so. I open it up, and it's an email from a guy who read my Hween post from last year, and liked it. (Search the Halloween tag to see the article he is referring to if you feel so inclined)

That is way fucking cool in my world.

To know I wrote something that a stranger agreed with and liked so much that he emailed me is a major kick in the pants. He says my "piece is put together nicely" (uh huh huh) and "moves well". He tells me he related to my experience and I did a nice job telling my tale.

It's ironic how these things sometimes work out. Right when I was in a funk and frustrated because I couldn't write anything decent, I get this from out of the blue. It's something I can bottle up for a while and use for inspiration. It's something I can use whenever I get around to writing the next few klogs. Although I do feel a bit more pressure for this year's Hween post knowing strangers might have expectations for it to live up to. But I guess that is kind of the point.....

As always, thanks for reading, and I hope to get some new klogs up here as soon as possible.