Since I haven't done any Bullshit Facts lately, I thought on this most holy and sacred day, to put up Bullshit Irish Proverbs. In the interest of scoring cheap Google hits, I didn't put 'bullshit' in the title. But I think they are true, anyway. It's not like I can make this stuff up....
The Irish don’t “black out” we take “wee naps” to recharge
Man I call best friend is the man who pays my tab
The ladies pop their gladdies when the lassies shake their assies
A shot of Jamison adds an inch
A shot of Tullamore adds a cup size
No matter how much we drink, U2 still blows
The only worse offense than drinking green beer is spilling green beer
Alcoholism is a made up disease; like depression and homosexuality
Scottsmen do wear skirts
Get the Mexicans outta here. Their holiday is 2 months away
Cabbage regenerates the liver
May the bottom of your glass come before the empty of your wallet
Guinness is the fuel of the world
You can tell the Irish bar stools by how good they look from underneath
July 4th is just another day
There be three levels of intoxication; drunk, FUBAR and MacGowan
Getting a kiss from a redhead is getting a kiss from God
May the wind rise to keep the vomit out of your hair
May you be a half hour in bed before the bartender realizes you skipped out on your tab
Hangovers are God’s way of letting you know you had a good time
Beer is an ugly man’s best friend
May the road rise to meet you as you fall to the gutter
Put silk on a goat, and it is still a goat. Ditto your wife
Sobriety always thwarts drunkenness
Marry a mountain girl, and you marry the whole mountain. Kinky
A bored man is not a drinking man
Better you plow a field by day than plow into a field at night
May your son marry a beautiful fair skinned redhead; my your daughter marry someone far more manly than that girly lad Michael Flatley
A bar that does not have at least two Irish brews on tap is a bar no one goes to
Are you looking at me? ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME?
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