Halloween Party Wrap Up

Originally written 10/29/7

When last I left you, it was with the Halloween dilemma. Since I feel like writing a bit, I thought I would go into how everything turned out.

This is a good stretch of days here. It started with the Hween party on Fri, then we had Halloween at Keswick Ave on Sun, and now the big day itself on Weds. I often thought of having a “poorman’s Halloween party” on the weekend right after Halloween. That way people could get their costumes half off, and maybe use them for a different party next year. But then I thought it might turn people off with the hassle of picking out a new costume. Besides, how many cool holidays can I create? Hallowmas season will soon be upon us. And I really think this year I will do Charitymas. Will people really go for a Poorman’s Halloween Party? Probably not. But I have a different idea for poorman. I call those days “Monday, “Tuesday”, “Wednesday”, etc. So just in case you still have a Halloween party to go to, here’s what I saw.

Brad & Lynne threw the party. Brad is a big Halloween guy, so he goes all out. Upon entering, we were greeted by The Nature Boy, 17 Time World Champ Ric Flair. Real easy costume; blonde wig, black robe that has glitter glue on it to look like Ric’s, boots with the RF lettering. To go that extra mile, he had a tape recorder behind his ghetto World belt that played the theme from Space Odyssey. His wife was dressed up as Elizabeth from the NWO. We went into the house, and saw the Desenex guy. This is easy to do if the guy is bald and everyone at the party is over 30. (I can hear all you kids ask what the hell is this.) Desenex is a shampoo that put out a famous commercial years ago. The guy would put one shampoo on half his head, and Desenex on the other. The Desenex side always tingled. So he had shaving cream on his head, and was dressed in a robe. OK, so this is the first 2 guys wearing robes. I didn’t know the hidden theme was sleepwear. Desenex’s wife wussed out and came as a cereal killer.

Going into the party, I had a few ideas that I was glad we didn’t do, because other people were doing them. Brad & Lynne were dressed as Howie Mandel & a suitcase girl from Deal or No Deal. Real easy costume. Guy has bald cap and dresses in a suit, she has a dress on and carries a suitcase (duh). Britney Spears and the other Kev were popular. One couple came dressed as them, complete with K Fed carrying pictures of all his kids. Nice touch. Their friend came dressed as Angelina Jolie. Long brown wig, big bug sunglasses, some visible tattoos, and baby dolls carried in a shoulder sling. The dolls were black and white, because as she pointed out “you can’t find an Egyptian baby doll at the dollar store”. Another couple came dressed as hot Brit and today Brit. I don’t recall seeing the hot Brit all night, so if I did, she didn’t make an impact on me. The husband is already bald, so he had a black top on complete with boobs, an animal print dress, ripped up fish net stockings and heels. And he wore the heels most of the night. This is some guy I play hockey with, so Monday night’s gonna be a bit weird. He also had an electric razor tied around his waist, along with 2 baby dolls.

There’s always someone at these parties who gets/rents a real costume. This year we were favored with Donald Duck and Mrs. Duck. They had the real deal, Disneyland like costumes. They were huge, bulky, and had to be hot as hell. Here’s the problem with people like this. They’re always in the way. The dining room wasn’t particularly small, but goddamn, every time I wanted to get some crab dip or some such shit, I had to navigate through a flock of duck to get to the damn table. Beer pong was set up in the garage. The garage was small, and got way smaller with a bunch of drunken people. And here’s Donald, bouncing off walls, batting people in the face, and sliding his duck ass on the table. I wished someone came dressed up as the dog from Duck Hunt.

Another couple came as Robert Palmer and one of the backing girls from the Addicted to Love video. Very good idea, but if you saw the guy (shirt and tie, white wig) walking around, you wouldn’t get it till you saw his girl. The Warriors were represented by another couple in baseball unis, faces made up, wigs, hats and bats. Brokeback Mountain lived on as another couple came dressed up as cowboys. She had sideburns and goatee drawn on. He has a tube of Vaseline. Both had butts sticking out of their pants. Obviously, some people have been checking out College Humor over the last few years. Kinda obvious in my book, but still fun. Someone came dressed as eggs and bacon. Bacon was a bulky costume just like Donald, but at least he had the decency to take the damn thing off in the garage. A guy came dressed as Dick in the Box. I thought this one was kinda obvious, but people ate this shit up. I don’t watch SNL, so maybe it’s me missing the point. Either he or his wife gets points for getting an actual fake dick.

O yea, and we came as police. (Damn it, why am I always Andy Summers?) We had a twist for it that I can’t go into here, but I thought it was a good inside joke. And Tara looked smoking fucking hot. I came up with the idea & twist literally the night before, so she had to “trust me” (snicker, snicker) to pick out something not too slutty. But she can arrest me anytime. GGGGGRRRRRRRRR.

Those were about the most creative. You have the folks that just whip something up (country boy, referee, scarecrow, and scientist). Or think they’re creative, but no one gets it (tow truck driver and sleepwalker he picks up-anyone else never hear this story?; tropical depression- a string of prescription bottles over a Hawaiian shirt).

Brad did the place up really cool. The garage had cardboard wraps that went over the walls depicting graveyards, etc. All kinds of lights, a dummy was on a shelf reaching down. The garage def had a kind of Xmas Eve vibe to it with the lighting and decoration and people laughing. Me and Tar ruled the Pong table for 3-4 games, including a thrilling double overtime victory. All in all, good clean fun. Very needed, very appreciated.

Usually, I just Spell-check this post out, but as an added bonus, I actually had Tara read this, and she snorted and laughed many times. So that’s a thumbs up. For the rest of you, I hope like you felt you were there. I hope your Hween activities measure up. Remember, you can always blame it on the costume and booze. Cheers.